Archive for the 'sucks' Category

Park by Phone is dead, again

Published October 7th, 2009 in cork parking, sucks, on street parking and cork city council. 1 Comment

We were surprised to hear about the “Launch” of Park by Phone in Cork City in the media recently. Our surprise emanates from the fact that this service has been available for years.

I can understand why it was [re]launched, you see it suffers from what we would like to call the American Express syndrome. It is a brand that people are vaguely familiar with, but no one actually seems to use.

It will be recalled that at the end of 2008

…Park by Phone Irl (sic) Ltd cease[d] operation of the phone parking system in Cork City, Ireland.  Cork City Council have engaged another company trading as ParkMagic to operate the service.

Interestingly this appeared to be part of an overall shakeup of on street parking in Cork City. Around the same time on-street parking metres appeared on the street. Here at Ambrand.com we upset that we could not use these gadgets, previously unseen in Cork, because we had a balance in our Park by Phone to use up.

Well like the evoting machines up the country the on-street parking meters now lie idle, all disabled for some presumably purposeful reason by Cork City Council.

So we can park again without feeling that we are missing an opportunity to use a gadget.

Or can we? We just tried to check our balance on www.parkbyphone.ie but the domain has been dropped! Isin’t it a pity that Cork City Council haven’t updated their webpage , sure people, who recently heard about the “launch” might think the service has already gone out of business!

Digiweb hosting sucks

Published July 11th, 2009 in how to lose customers, poor customer support, bad hosts, digiweb and sucks. 4 Comments

I have many sites, with many different hosts. I’ve decided to consolidate.

Consolidation is a nice word, but the downside is it means one is putting all ones egges on one basket.

So I will need to check the quality of the baskets before putting my eggs in. To dispense with the metaphore this means I will need to somehow guage the quality of hosts before opening accounts.

At the start of last week I was 99% ready to give my business to Digiweb, whom I previously admired. But now I wouldn’t dream of it. So what happened in the last week?

I received an email invoice to renew the cheapest plan they had. I’ve been using it for the last year to host one site. However the invoice is very badly designed. It wants me, the customer, to jump through hoops to pay. There is no hyperlink to a credit card form, not even a fax number where I can fax a completed form. I am asked, in the small print, to phone their customers support line, which I do only to hear a recorded message saying it is only open xam to a-pm monday to friday blah blah blah.

I print the email to take it to work the next day, so I’ll have the figures in front of me when calling. I phone during office hours and hear a recorded message again, thinking they are still closed I hang up. After two more attempts I google their name to see if they have gone out of business, or been bought by a larger more faceless corporation like Namesco. But there are no rumblings online. So I phone the number again, and listen to the entire message, ah it turns out that is just there 1 minute standard introduction, yawn. So I press X to speak to a customer service agent, but all the agents are currently busy.

That night I receive an automated email

Please be advised that the credit card / laser card details we hold on file for your account has failed for payment as the card details are now invalid / expired.
Your account is now in arrears and WILL BE SUSPENDED IN 3 DAYS unless payment is received in full.

I emailled their customer support outlining how they are committing the cardinal sin of making it difficult for a customer to pay! I get no reply. I still want to do business with digiweb because they use hsphere (my favourite hosting control panel) albeit an emasculated version of hsphere, where the billing section is disabled, hence the need for the above, along with other toys such as throttle being absent.

So just moments ago I logged into the relevant registrar and changed the DNS for the hosted domain to another host I use. I moved the Digiweb emails to the “Storage” folder in outlook, and shredded the printed invoice. Goodbye Digiweb.

1and1 sucks

Published May 2nd, 2009 in fool me once, once bitten twice shy, poor service, customer support nightmare, blacklist, renewal scam, problems, bad registrars, 1and1 sucks and sucks. 2 Comments

1and1 is a domain registrar. I used them last year to register a novelty domain that now has a successful blog on it. I chose them because - at the time - their price was the best around. I intended to transfer the domain to my favourite registrar (GoDaddy) before it expired.

However about 10 months in I got an automated email from 1and1 saying they had just charged my credit card, I logged into the control panel and say that “Auto renew” or something similar was enabled, so I blamed myself for not turning that off previously, and for not cancelling the PayPal billing agreement.

However, a WHOIS showed that 1and1 hadn’t actually added another year to the expiration date. I emailled their customer support address and the responder, whom I assume is based in India, said, in a roundabout manner, that the extra year would only be added on the expiration date.

Now, if you know about domains, then you’ll realise the problem this creates. If I transfer the domain away, say today, then by the time that original expiration date comes around the domain will be with another registrar and 1and1 will get to keep my money, without having provided any service, that is what is known as 100% profit, good for them, but a textbook rip off for me.

Today I got an automated email from 1and1 reminding me to renew the domain. WTF they already took the money, sounds like my friend in India doesn’t know what he’s talking about. I have little time to bad registrars, and having encountered multiple problems the time has come to jump ship, and transfer the domain away. Yes, I’ll lose USD 8.88 approx, but it has to be done.

Goodbye 1and1 I will never use your services ever again, this was your a second chance.

Ulster Bank sees red

Published April 1st, 2009 in proofreader, customer service, editor, poor design, ulster bank, bad design and sucks. 0 Comments

I went in to Ulster Bank to lodge money to my landlords account. The reason I went to the branch - and didn’t just do a credit transfer using online banking from the comfort of my palace - is because I like to have a paper receipt as evidence that I paid the rent, should the landlord later despite the fact. Alas, a printout from online banking just doesn’t carry the weight of a real receipt. Remember a receipt, by definition not supposed to be produced by yourself!

As a loyal customer of the competing AIB Bank (who incidentally have the best online banking in Ireland), I entered the Ulster branch sheepishly. Surprisingly there biros actually worked, also the writing desk ran the length of the queue allowing me to complete the lodgement docket while keeping my place in the moving queue.

However, the lodgement docket on the desk looked like some internal piece of paperwork that had been put out accidentally. Firstly it was printed in red ink, now as we all know red means danger! Colour is a wondrous thing, but when it comes to serious documents care must be exercised. Black is always good, the default choice. The only other colour acceptable in my opinion is the corporate colour of the bank, for example AIB uses purple and Permament TSB uses blue, and that is good.

Returning to the red docket, the words didn’t make sense.

  • What is the word “house” doing there? At a glance I thought this a a mortgage payment docket
  • What does “Details for advice to receipient” mean, it is not even written in proper English
  • What is “Description Value”, if it just read “Value” it would refer to the Euro currency amount

With these difficult questions in mind I half filed in the docket, and after watching Sky News UK on the widescreen TV, I made it to the counter, and presented the half completed docket with “House/Truncated Credit” crossed out and Lodgement written instead. I then got a printed receipt, not a counter foil.

ulster.jpg

€160 health levy

Published December 31st, 2008 in health insurance, over taxation, sucks, fianna fail and rip off. 0 Comments

The Government of Ireland included many unpopular measures in it’s 2009 budget.

But budgets are always unpopular. That is why even the upper house cannot veto a money bill indefinitely, belt tightening is sometimes just necessary, whether we like it or not.

The highlight, or rather lowlight, or the budget for us at Ambrand.com is the €160 levy on private health insurance. For those not familiar with the Irish health system health insurance is a must if you want to reduce waiting times, and stay healthy.

For example it costs € 55 to visit a General Practitioner (GP) and that comes out of the patients pocket. Some people have wonderious items called “medical cards” which are the defacto universal discount cards in Ireland; Free unlimited GP visits, reduced FOI request fees, and a whole host of other non health related benefits.

Alas, I am not self employed and cannot arrange my income figures suitably to enjoy a medical card. So I pay for my own Voluntary Health Insurance from the aptly named VHI.

Unfortunately my renewal date is after 1st January 2009, and so in addition to the premium I will be obliged to pay € 160 which will go straight into the coffers of the Government.

This reminds me of DIRT tax - a tax on saving. Alas, the Government must look after the “sponger” (use in a tongue in cheek fashion) by taxing the “well off”?

Naturally the levy tax has no sunset clause, and just like the 2 percent “temporary” levy on car insurance it will continue next year.

The Office of Tobacco Control

Published December 31st, 2008 in taxpayers money, squeezing small business, walmart, quanto watch, quango monitor, sucks, quango and irish government. 0 Comments

Having been established after a report on tobacco - which we all agree is now a harmful subsyance - The “Office” received statutory status in May 2002, with the enactment of section 2 of the Public Health (Tobacco) Act, 2002.

Their website lists the functions as

1. To advise the Minister for Health and Children, and assist him in the implementation of policies and objectives of the Government, on the control and regulation of tobacco products generally
2. To consult with relevant national and international bodies on developments in tobacco control
3. To advise the Minister on any further actions that should be taken to reduce or eliminate smoking or its effects
4. Organise research and disseminate the results
5. Coordinate a national inspection programme in cooperation with the health boards
6. To advise the Minister as required on the manufacturing and marketing activities of the tobacco industry
7. To perform such other functions as the Minister may assign to the Office from time to time.

We can surmise from the copious mention of the word Advise and Minister above that the essential role of the Office is to, well, to Advise the Minister on all matters relating to tobacco.

But on their website there is one extra paragraph under the heading of functions, it is not even assigned a bullet point number, but it is the most significant function.

“In addition the Office of Tobacco Control will perform certain specific functions such as the maintenance of a register of retail premises…”

So if you own a retail premises that sells tobacco, whether is it a newsagent or bar you will have to register that fact with the Office of Tobacco Control.

Naturally there will be a form to be completed by the retailer and we can understand that, but speaking from experience I just know the obligations will be more.

Once again, this is an example of “The Government” wrapping more red tape around the small retailer. There will be a form to complete, and of course, a fee to be paid. Sure lets make it every year, and because he won’t want it lets ensure there is a totally inappropriate penalty for failure to comply, perhaps a prison sentence?

Bear in mind the retailer is already busy going about his daily business - ordering tobacco as required - and now he will be required to pay a fee for something he never asked and doesn’t want.

pool.com locked me out

Published December 31st, 2008 in custhelp, problem, sucks and ambrand. 0 Comments

I am not a fan of pool.com

For some months now I’ve been locked out of my pool.com account. When I try to login it says my username/password combination is incorrect.

Firstly why can’t it be specific as to which is incorrect? Is it the username or the password. Well it turns out that both are correct. If I use the “Forgot Password” route I am emailled my password, which is correct.

But yet the system won’t let me in. The drones on technical support are of no assistance. As we all have experienced when dealing with large companies (anything above 20 persons in my book) a different person signs off each email, and despite there being a subject tracking number they never seem to read back one page. Thus the customer remains the expert on an issue and the customer service drone is a chair warmer.He or she only has the power and inclination tosuggest I do something I’ve already done i.e. use the “Forgot Password” route.

I assume pool.com eats its own dog food, and thus I must conclude the reason for the lockout is I have bagged a good domain and someone in pool.com wants it. They have ensured I cannot login so that I cannot update my credit card information. Once a certain period has elapsed the domain will revert into the hands of pool.com itself as I will be a non paying customer. At that point perhaps my account will be unlocked?

Suggestion: If you use pool.com then input your credit card that has the longest expiry date.

Viking Direct Insurance Scam

Published November 11th, 2008 in stationary, shopping basket, mail order, optional extra, office supplies, shopping cart, levy, sucks, viking direct, office depot, staples and scam. 1 Comment

I’ve always had a soft spot for Viking Direct. As a child I drooled over the monthly catalogues admiring the various office equipment and stationary as if it was a toy catalogue.

Just like the Remington Company Viking Direct then had a grey haired spokesman. Mr Irwin Helford. Under his tenure Viking sought to increase its customer base and mailed catalogues to potential customers who had never ordered from the company, it was not junk mail as it had genuinely interesting content. Irwin was an usual first name in the UK/Ireland so he was referred to by an initial, but this gave him more importance in my eyes. His distinguished appearance was a rubber stamp of quality, and consistency.

As time went on Viking grew and now is part of the Office Depot group and I Helford has aged and no can longer be seen endorsing products in the catalogues.

Moving onto the crux of this article you are probably wondering why I use the emotive word “suck” in the title. Well pay attention 007. As you will know most goods bought in the Ireland come with a 12 month warranty covering bad workmanship. It doesn’t cover accidents caused by a purchasers   butterfingers or misuse. If such coverage is required then an optional warranty can be bought on most big ticket items (i.e. flat screen TVs, washing machines and so on).

Consumables should never have warranties. But I am sorry to have just learned that on the viking direct website a ream of blank paper has a warranty, as does a box of paperclip, and this is not a free 12 month warranty, it is instead an itemised and unavoidable warranty charged at 2% of the items price. Viking call it “Extra Protection Plus” but I would prefer to borrow use the lexicon of the Irish Government and refer to it as a levy.

The levy is not removable during online purchasing. It only appears at the final stage, and we all know that by that time the potential customer has put so much effort into choosing his exact products at his exact price that he will be inclined to press “order” regardless of any minor additional charge. This is already the case on Airline websites where a variable “fuel surcharge” appears. Viking must realise this because if one instead opts for a fax order form the name/address field is not pre-populated,so the form is too time consuming compared with purchasing online.

The levy extends the warranty to cover accidental damage. So, I presume if I accidentally drop my ream of paper and it somehow tears in half I will be covered. Does it also cover bad print jobs, I mean all those sheets of paper that I throw away because of typos, could I send them back to viking for a refund? Indeed could I send them my a4 junk maik, no that would be wrong, very wrong. I don’t mind upselling, in McDonalds the customer is always asked “and would you like extra fries with that”, but what I do not like is non-optional, sneaky extras.

You have been warned!

Pay per post

Published June 5th, 2008 in pay per post, sucks and uncategorized. 0 Comments

Usually when people talk about ads on blogs the focus is on Adsense. But some blogs make money from Pay per post articles. So in the interests of journalism I looked into this.

Conclusion: Its too tacky, even for Ambrand.com, plus ahem the returns are too low, and are paid is US Dollars which are laughably worthless at the moment.

Diners Club is Dead - Long live Diners Club

Published February 13th, 2008 in diners club, sucks and nostalgia. 0 Comments

Diners Club; the logo and name are familiar but they are only now seen on

“the peeling window decals of closed restaurants of the service charge/dress code variety, the former haunts of the gray flannel suit businessman”

That was what we said last month in an article on Credit Cards. Now, having had time to muse we still agree. It’s hard to even get an application form for the card in Ireland, so you might imagine it is an ultra exclusive magical card. But it has more problems then benefits.

Problems

  • Poor acceptance (only large hotels and upmarket restaurants will take it, and even then they will try the “Do you have any other cards - because Diners Club take a high fee and take ages to pay us” - line)
  • It is a charge card (so if you spend too much and find you can’t pay it off in full you are in trouble, this is unlike a credit card where you could, if necessary, make the minimum payment and tackle the remainder later)

Benefits

  • Access to Airport lounges worldwide (UK and Irish lounge service terminated with an on 31st October 2007)
  • Rewards (what might I ask is wrong with cash, why must rewards always be compicated points systems, with Diners you can convert your Club Club Rewards to vouchers for “selected” - i.e. limited - high-street retailers)

We have looked at Diners Club in Ireland, which is part of their UK franchise. The situation in the USA is different. There the card it a MasterCard that happens to have the Diners Club logo printed on it, like a Sports team affiliation credit card Thus it is accepted everywhere that a MasterCard is. Yet isn’t a pity the corporate overlords at Citibank have chosen to slowly kill Diners Club, surely the drop-down menus of websites worldwide will be poorer for its loss, and the flash value of the executives wallet will be diminished.

We are sure the Diners Club was an amazing card, and the story of its founder is wonderful, but today - and we do live today :) - there are simply much better cards on the market; cards that offer more, cost less, and are easier to apply for.

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